Beste Tjomme (Dear Tom),

When we first met at elementary school some 45 years ago, who would have thought that we would become friends for life. We shared a passion for model trains – soon to become model planes – and were keen on cycling in Summer and skating in Winter. Your mother used to accompany us in those early years on various cycling and skating tours that were organized around Bolsward, the Frysian town where we grew up.

Reading books, lots of books in fact, was another favorite activity of ours. In grade 5 and 6, I remember you reading secretly while my dad, who was our schoolteacher, was explaining arithmetic to the rest of the class. Every Tuesday evening, we borrowed our pile of books for the week from the library and then went to your home to watch “The Little House on the Prairie” with a bowl of peanuts in our hands.

In grade 7, however, we had to go to different secondary schools to pursue individual professional interests and this could have meant the end of our friendship. Instead, this friendship deepened during the following years with a mutual hobby of building and flying radio-controlled aircraft and a burning desire to travel. Our cycling trip in Ireland in the Summer of 1982 and our epic journey by Greyhound bus around the United States, one year before you got married to Jantine, are indelible memories.

We did not just do things together in a material sense, we also developed our conscience in parallel as we went to church on Sundays and attended catechism together. And … we grew fond of each other’s parents and siblings, meaning we felt comfortable and at ease around each other’s home.

Destiny made you go to Canada, whereas I settled in Toulouse, France. We got married and, what seemed natural but is never a given, our wives got along as well. We kept in touch despite the physical distance that separated us, seeing each other every 4 years or so. What struck me every time we met after such a period was that I simply felt good in your presence again and I like to think that you felt the same way too.

Three-and-a-half years ago, you wrote to me about the serious illness that you had been diagnosed with. It came as a terrible shock but also allowed us to see each other more frequently: first in Toulouse, then in Fergus and lately in Bolsward. In Toulouse and Fergus, we met in the presence of our families. In Bolsward, we were on our own and realized that this would be the last time. We did not need a lot of words to express ourselves on that occasion, as we both knew that we had been blessed with one of the greatest gifts on earth: experiencing true and everlasting friendship.

Tjomme, I feel privileged to have known you and the people that have been dearest to you: Jantine, your children, parents, brother and sisters. Thanks for calling me your friend.

Gerrit